I have to admit I had no idea there even was a big lottery until yesterday when everyone was posting about it on Facebook. As nice as it would be to win the lottery (do you know how many adoptions 1 million dollars would pay for, let alone 300 million??), we don't play the lottery. A lot of people were also posting about the odds of winning the lottery compared to the odds of other things, such as having a 1 in 280,000 chance of getting struck by lightning, or being 100 times more likely to be killed by flesh-eating bacteria than you are to win the lottery. Chances of winning last night's lottery were 1 in 176 million, so you're still pretty safe from that flesh eating bacteria.
But I have a happy odds story to share! I've shared part of it before but I'll recap:
When we were in Ethiopia last April, we took lots of pictures of Jeb and his friends. 1 of his best friends had a family from our agency who asked us to take pictures of their son, so we made sure to get lots of pictures of him. His other best friend loved getting his picture taken and kept tapping me and saying "photo!" and then posing with a cheesy grin. I took a ton of pictures of him, and he always wanted to look at each one after I took them, then post for another.
When we got home I emailed our agency and asked if he had a family yet. They responded that he did have a family, but through a different agency so they didn't have any more information to give us. This was a national agency with branches in many states, but I really wanted this family to see all the adorable pictures of their son, so I went to the website and clicked 'contact us'. I gave his name and age, and the name of the orphanage and said we had just been there and taken lots of pictures, and if they could pass our contact information to the family of this boy, that would be great. Months went by and I never heard anything back, but I figured it was a long shot and hadn't really been expecting anything.
Then one day this past fall I got an email from T's mother! We exchanged stories and pictures and realized we had a lot in common, including the fact that we are both Christian families with 2 younger kids who are adopting older boys. They only live a 6 hour drive from us, which is a doable distance, and meeting half way makes it even more doable.
We didn't understand why we were waiting so long to bring Jebriel home, until this past January when Eric got to go pick Jebriel up at the same time that the parents of both his best friends were there for court. The parents all got to meet in person, and the boys all got to see that we are friends and will see each other again.
When Jebriel left the orphanage, both other parents were there to see their boys' sadness at losing their friend, and here in America, our son asks about his friends all the time. I thought my longing would be over once our son was home, but knowing that his friends are still waiting and missing him, and their parents are still waiting and missing their sons, I still feel incomplete.
His best friend Tariku is finally coming home this weekend, which is a blessing in itself, BUT the cheapest flight for his parents to take coming home involves a 6 hour layover at our local airport! They get to see each other, face to face, after 3 months apart, not knowing what the other was doing or when they would meet again. After spending over a year together eating, sleeping, and playing in the same room, 3 months apart is a long time! The 3rd musketeer is still waiting, please pray for the little guy and everyone who touches his paperwork as it moves through the process. I can't wait to reunite the 3 of them!
What are the odds that 2 random American families in 2 neighboring states would use 2 separate agencies to adopt 2 little boys who were born in 2 different areas of Ethiopia, would get the opportunity to form a friendship, and then be brought together to meet on the other side of the world, and now to be given an entire day to spend together? I don't have a number for you, but I'm going to say the chances of this happening are pretty slim!
Showing posts with label adoption. Show all posts
Showing posts with label adoption. Show all posts
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Monday, February 27, 2012
Connections
There is a funny thing that happens to you when you adopt. You don't think about it at first-you decide to adopt a child to grow your family. Another little face at the dinner table, to read bedtime stories to. But what a lot of people don't realize is, whether you like it or not, you can never add a child to your family without bringing part of their history with them. Adopting a child is not a 'cleaning of the slate'. They get to start a new life in our family, but they come to us with a history, and people who helped them to get to where they are.
Adopting the girls as babies, we bring their people up to keep them in their vocabulary and their thoughts every so often. Had it not been important to us, we could have just left their past in the past and they wouldn't remember anyone, but that wouldn't feel right.
Adopting an 'older' child though, comes with even more of a history, and not one that we can choose or alter for them. Jebriel spent his time at his orphanage with a handful of other children, all of whom he mentions from time to time, but he has 2 best friends who are on his mind a lot. He is old enough to understand adoption, and to understand that he left his friends and came to America with us, while his friends stayed 'home'. They spent every moment together for so much of their little lives, and suddenly he left them, not knowing when he would see them again.
Thankfully, and amazingly, he WILL see his best friends again. We were able to connect with the parents of both his best friends (across agencies even!). They both live in neighboring states within a day's drive, and when Eric was there to pick Jeb up, both other sets of parents were there for court, so they all got to meet, and were able to tell the boys that they would see each other again.
Eric and Jeb left for home before the other families, and they reported that their little boys, who had to stay behind for now, took his leaving very hard. For Jeb, he hasn't been upset about them until tonight. Everything was new and different and exciting. He was finally getting parents and coming to America, something the older kids at the orphanage apparently talked up quite a bit.
But tonight, as part of our daily routine, Eric finished reading bedtime stories, and we all sat on the bed and held hands to pray. We pray specifically for his best friends, as well as 2 other girls being adopted with one of the boys, and usually Jebriel enjoys repeating their names, but tonight he looked really sad. We tried to assure him that they would come to America soon, and he asked "after take a nap?" and looked even more sad when we had to tell him no, they would not be in America after his nap. He is old enough to understand the concept of seeing them again and their joining him in America, but doesn't quite understand the concept of time yet. These boys are more than best friends to him, they are his brothers, a constant in his life. We know that he is happy here and adjusting and attaching to us very well, but they are his family too.
With the addition of Jebriel to our lives, we also add these little boys, and their families. Their pictures decorate our son's room. We have 2 more Christmas cards to send, 2 more road trip destinations, 2 more people I can call friends. While we wait for all the boys to come home, we keep up with each other on facebook, through emails, and even phone calls. We share this special bond, and have so much else in common as well, only God could have orchestrated it this way.
It makes life a little more complicated, a little harder to explain to the kids and to others about our 'extended family', and it isn't the life some people want, but adoption has helped us (forced us?) to broaden our horizons, and our family, and step out of the familiar and comfortable to experience all the amazing things that God can do, and it is always amazing us!
We aren't able to post pictures of the other boys until they are home, but they are a very handsome, photogenic bunch and we have a lot of great pictures of each of them, as well as some great group shots that we cherish. Please pray that all of the paperwork gets done quickly so they can come home to their families where they belong. I can't wait to see their next group picture!
Adopting the girls as babies, we bring their people up to keep them in their vocabulary and their thoughts every so often. Had it not been important to us, we could have just left their past in the past and they wouldn't remember anyone, but that wouldn't feel right.
Adopting an 'older' child though, comes with even more of a history, and not one that we can choose or alter for them. Jebriel spent his time at his orphanage with a handful of other children, all of whom he mentions from time to time, but he has 2 best friends who are on his mind a lot. He is old enough to understand adoption, and to understand that he left his friends and came to America with us, while his friends stayed 'home'. They spent every moment together for so much of their little lives, and suddenly he left them, not knowing when he would see them again.
Thankfully, and amazingly, he WILL see his best friends again. We were able to connect with the parents of both his best friends (across agencies even!). They both live in neighboring states within a day's drive, and when Eric was there to pick Jeb up, both other sets of parents were there for court, so they all got to meet, and were able to tell the boys that they would see each other again.
Eric and Jeb left for home before the other families, and they reported that their little boys, who had to stay behind for now, took his leaving very hard. For Jeb, he hasn't been upset about them until tonight. Everything was new and different and exciting. He was finally getting parents and coming to America, something the older kids at the orphanage apparently talked up quite a bit.
But tonight, as part of our daily routine, Eric finished reading bedtime stories, and we all sat on the bed and held hands to pray. We pray specifically for his best friends, as well as 2 other girls being adopted with one of the boys, and usually Jebriel enjoys repeating their names, but tonight he looked really sad. We tried to assure him that they would come to America soon, and he asked "after take a nap?" and looked even more sad when we had to tell him no, they would not be in America after his nap. He is old enough to understand the concept of seeing them again and their joining him in America, but doesn't quite understand the concept of time yet. These boys are more than best friends to him, they are his brothers, a constant in his life. We know that he is happy here and adjusting and attaching to us very well, but they are his family too.
With the addition of Jebriel to our lives, we also add these little boys, and their families. Their pictures decorate our son's room. We have 2 more Christmas cards to send, 2 more road trip destinations, 2 more people I can call friends. While we wait for all the boys to come home, we keep up with each other on facebook, through emails, and even phone calls. We share this special bond, and have so much else in common as well, only God could have orchestrated it this way.
It makes life a little more complicated, a little harder to explain to the kids and to others about our 'extended family', and it isn't the life some people want, but adoption has helped us (forced us?) to broaden our horizons, and our family, and step out of the familiar and comfortable to experience all the amazing things that God can do, and it is always amazing us!
We aren't able to post pictures of the other boys until they are home, but they are a very handsome, photogenic bunch and we have a lot of great pictures of each of them, as well as some great group shots that we cherish. Please pray that all of the paperwork gets done quickly so they can come home to their families where they belong. I can't wait to see their next group picture!
Saturday, February 18, 2012
First time at the arcade!
Our local adoption group meets at a different family-friendly location once a month, where we get to try something new, as well as hang out with our friends. The arcade was fun, but it was loud and crowded, so the adults didn't get quite was much socializing time as usual. On the way out the door, I grabbed my pouch sling, just in case. Journey usually rides on my back in the sling (she calls it 'ride mommy' haha!) while I'm cleaning up before, and while I make dinner, and sometimes mid morning when I'm cleaning and she would rather cuddle with me than go play. We don't usually take it out of the house because she likes to walk around and we rarely need it, but for some reason I grabbed it. And I was glad I did!
It was dim, which usually makes it hard for Journey to see, and with all the flashing lights all over, she was totally overwhelmed. I put her in the sling on my front and figured she'd warm up eventually, but she never did. She didn't want to ride anything, or touch anything, or talk to anyone, poor baby!
Jeb and Vivi loved all the little kid rides, so much that we just let them run around and sit in them for awhile before we showed them that they move if you put a quarter in them!
Driving a train, of course!
The only picture we got of Journey, who was brave enough to touch a ball for a couple of minutes. I think that's a pig behind me? I didn't even notice it at the time, the arcade was full of stuff like that!
This game was great, it was a 'play till you win', and the crane picked up candy on the first try for both kids.
It was dim, which usually makes it hard for Journey to see, and with all the flashing lights all over, she was totally overwhelmed. I put her in the sling on my front and figured she'd warm up eventually, but she never did. She didn't want to ride anything, or touch anything, or talk to anyone, poor baby!
Jeb and Vivi loved all the little kid rides, so much that we just let them run around and sit in them for awhile before we showed them that they move if you put a quarter in them!
Driving a train, of course!
The only picture we got of Journey, who was brave enough to touch a ball for a couple of minutes. I think that's a pig behind me? I didn't even notice it at the time, the arcade was full of stuff like that!
This game was great, it was a 'play till you win', and the crane picked up candy on the first try for both kids.
Friday, February 17, 2012
Henry Ford Museum
This year is a non-adoption year for us (we think! ;) so Eric doesn't have to save up the 6 weeks of vacation he gets. Which means more family fun days!
So, last Friday, Eric took the day off and we all went out to the Henry Ford Museum! We thought our train and car loving son would enjoy seeing the real life trains and cars, and they would all enjoy the big open spaces to run around.
The night before, I packed lunches for everyone. My dream is to someday be an awesome, adorable bento maker. Not that I'll ever be this good, but I can dream!
Anyway... in the morning, we headed out! We knew we would get a membership, because adult tickets plus parking are kind of high. And the membership covers the museum and Greenfield Village in the spring/summer. They're all still a little young to appreciate the history of it all, but there are cars and trains and Greenfield Village has a real train you can ride (for a little extra money). We're pretty excited! When we were signing up for the membership, the woman asked what kind of membership we wanted, and I said "just a regular family membership, unless there are other options." She asked how old the kids are and it turns out kids get in free until their 5th birthday! Since Jebriel won't be 5 until the end of September, we ended up going with the membership for one adult plus a guest. That way Eric can be the guest if he takes a day off, or I can bring a friend who also has kids under 5 and we can all get in free. And it's a way cheaper membership, I was so glad she brought it up! When he turns 5, we can pay the extra to upgrade, but probably won't do that until we need to, if Eric has a day off and we all want to go.
We headed right for the cars first, and had only been in the museum for about 5 minutes when I heard Eric call my name. I turned around and saw this:
That's right, Vivi saw a gap in the gate, stuck her head in, and couldn't get it back out. And yes, I took a picture before I tried to get her out ;) We attracted a small crowd as we twisted and turned her to get her out. I climbed over the gate and we eventually pulled her all the way through because her head was not going back the way it came. Good thing she has a skinny body! Impressively, she didn't panic, probably in part because Eric and I were cracking up.
After we got her out, we decided to find a different exhibit with less fencing. He really liked climbing on the trains, until he saw out the engine window a giant miniature train display with a bunch of different trains going around the track. He was mesmerized! We watched that for a loong time, and then they had a hands-on area that they had up around Christmas but it was so popular, they hadn't taken it down yet. It had train tables and legos with wheels so you could build your own trains.
Now that we have both genders of children, we really get to see the difference between boys and girls. Here you'll see that Journey made a lego baby, and was rocking it and carrying it around:
Vivi used a piece with wheels to make a baby stroller, and a little lego block was the baby. She took her baby for rides up and down the floor.
And Jebriel spent the entire time very seriously driving the trains around the track, sometimes with sound effects.
They spent a looong time with the trains:
They also had a group talking and singing songs for Black History Month, the kids enjoyed dancing and clapping their hands. During a particularly lively song about the protests, they had passed out picket signs to a lot of the kids that said things like 'equality for all', and between verses of the song, everyone was chanting "Freedom! Now! Freedom! Now!". Vivi chose that moment to get away from me and climb up on the stage. As I hopped up the stage to go after her, I realized what an ironic scene we were making, a white woman chasing a little black girl in front of the whole crowd as the crowd chanted "Freedom! Now!" while waving picket signs, and couldn't help but laugh. Luckily my laughing made Vivi laugh as I caught up to her, so I didn't have to carry a kicking and screaming little black girl off the stage as they chanted "Freedom! Now!" It also made me a little bit reflective-what a difference a few decades has made! A few decades ago our family would not have been allowed to look like this.
She made up for it during the last song by dancing with one of the performers, who showed her how to take a bow at the end. We had a nice conversation with him after the show, and all the kids got little pins to wear that say 'henceforward shall be free!'.
And then we got some family shots with the Weinermobile before heading home:
So, last Friday, Eric took the day off and we all went out to the Henry Ford Museum! We thought our train and car loving son would enjoy seeing the real life trains and cars, and they would all enjoy the big open spaces to run around.
The night before, I packed lunches for everyone. My dream is to someday be an awesome, adorable bento maker. Not that I'll ever be this good, but I can dream!
Anyway... in the morning, we headed out! We knew we would get a membership, because adult tickets plus parking are kind of high. And the membership covers the museum and Greenfield Village in the spring/summer. They're all still a little young to appreciate the history of it all, but there are cars and trains and Greenfield Village has a real train you can ride (for a little extra money). We're pretty excited! When we were signing up for the membership, the woman asked what kind of membership we wanted, and I said "just a regular family membership, unless there are other options." She asked how old the kids are and it turns out kids get in free until their 5th birthday! Since Jebriel won't be 5 until the end of September, we ended up going with the membership for one adult plus a guest. That way Eric can be the guest if he takes a day off, or I can bring a friend who also has kids under 5 and we can all get in free. And it's a way cheaper membership, I was so glad she brought it up! When he turns 5, we can pay the extra to upgrade, but probably won't do that until we need to, if Eric has a day off and we all want to go.
We headed right for the cars first, and had only been in the museum for about 5 minutes when I heard Eric call my name. I turned around and saw this:
That's right, Vivi saw a gap in the gate, stuck her head in, and couldn't get it back out. And yes, I took a picture before I tried to get her out ;) We attracted a small crowd as we twisted and turned her to get her out. I climbed over the gate and we eventually pulled her all the way through because her head was not going back the way it came. Good thing she has a skinny body! Impressively, she didn't panic, probably in part because Eric and I were cracking up.
After we got her out, we decided to find a different exhibit with less fencing. He really liked climbing on the trains, until he saw out the engine window a giant miniature train display with a bunch of different trains going around the track. He was mesmerized! We watched that for a loong time, and then they had a hands-on area that they had up around Christmas but it was so popular, they hadn't taken it down yet. It had train tables and legos with wheels so you could build your own trains.
Now that we have both genders of children, we really get to see the difference between boys and girls. Here you'll see that Journey made a lego baby, and was rocking it and carrying it around:
Vivi used a piece with wheels to make a baby stroller, and a little lego block was the baby. She took her baby for rides up and down the floor.
And Jebriel spent the entire time very seriously driving the trains around the track, sometimes with sound effects.
They spent a looong time with the trains:
They also had a group talking and singing songs for Black History Month, the kids enjoyed dancing and clapping their hands. During a particularly lively song about the protests, they had passed out picket signs to a lot of the kids that said things like 'equality for all', and between verses of the song, everyone was chanting "Freedom! Now! Freedom! Now!". Vivi chose that moment to get away from me and climb up on the stage. As I hopped up the stage to go after her, I realized what an ironic scene we were making, a white woman chasing a little black girl in front of the whole crowd as the crowd chanted "Freedom! Now!" while waving picket signs, and couldn't help but laugh. Luckily my laughing made Vivi laugh as I caught up to her, so I didn't have to carry a kicking and screaming little black girl off the stage as they chanted "Freedom! Now!" It also made me a little bit reflective-what a difference a few decades has made! A few decades ago our family would not have been allowed to look like this.
She made up for it during the last song by dancing with one of the performers, who showed her how to take a bow at the end. We had a nice conversation with him after the show, and all the kids got little pins to wear that say 'henceforward shall be free!'.
And then we got some family shots with the Weinermobile before heading home:
Saturday, January 28, 2012
A belated 2 week update
Jebriel has been home for 16 days now! I had planned on posting a reflection of the first 2 weeks on Thursday but, it didn't happen :)
The past week has started to feel more 'normal' and less like we are still getting used to each other. He has figured out our routine and knows what behaviors we will and won't tolerate. That doesn't mean he follows them all the time, he IS a 4 year old boy after all ;) but for the most part he's a very well behaved child. He is gentle with his sisters-if they argue over a toy he won't yank it away or push them, he just holds on tight and calls for one of us to come to the rescue.
He came to us terrified of animals, we had to keep our cats locked in the back room for the first 2 days. Then he slowly got used to them and stopped freaking out when he saw them, and now he's totally fine with them. Except at night-part of his bedtime routine is making sure there are no cats hiding in his room :)
Then the first time we went to my parents' house, he got upset when he saw their cats. Well, technically he saw Moses, the giant fluffy cat with no tail, so in his defense, he may not have realized it was a cat. But, we were just over for dinner tonight and he saw and petted both cats without stressing out about it. Our next plan of action is to find a very well behaved little dog, and move up from there. My sister has 2 big dogs that can be wild and loud, and Eric's brother has 2 big dogs that are total lovers, but in an in-your-face, lick-you-all-over kind of way that is cute unless they are as tall as you and you're afraid of animals. It hasn't taken him long to start overcoming his fear of cats, so hopefully he'll be a dog lover soon too. Not so much that he wants one as a pet though ;)
He was very wary of new foods, and at every meal would scan the table and make sure I was aware of all the things he would not eat by pointing and saying "mama, no" and waving his hand over his plate. The first few days he was home, we let it slide. Everything was new and different, so we let him eat whatever made him feel comfortable. But as he became more comfortable, we slowly started requiring that he at least have the food on his plate, whether he touched it or not, and eventually put our 'rule' into place for him too that before you get seconds of anything, you need to take a 'polite bite' of the other food on your plate. We never require eating a whole pile of anything they actually don't like, but encourage a polite bite and remind them that they might like it, and won't know unless they try. The first few meals with this rule, he left the table after eating the food that he did like on his plate. Then he would very reluctantly and dramatically take a tiny taste and be sure to act disgusted.
After awhile though, he could no longer hide his liking for some of the foods he tried. It started with carrots-every afternoon I cut up some fresh veggies, I try to do an assortment of colors, to put out before dinner. They get a snack after naptime, but if they are hungry between 4pm and dinner, they can eat the veggies. For days, he would scoff at the bowl and never go near it, and then stand in the kitchen and ask for dinner every 2 minutes. Then one day, I was cutting up some carrots and he asked to see. I showed him and offered him one, and he took it. And ate it. And asked for more. That day, I had to cut more carrots, which I never have to do. Then it was mango-he spent 10 minutes making sure I knew he would NOT touch the mango on his plate, and then when it came time to take a polite bite before having more pasta, he only acted a little bit disgusted, and as I was scooping more pasta, he ate another piece, and ended up eating half a mango. Now that he's realizing that he actually DOES like a lot of new foods, he is much more willing to try them. One thing I know for sure he doesn't like though is red bell pepper. He very confidently took a bite when both girls were eating them and made a genuine yucky face!
We've had a couple of family dinners, with my parents, Eric's parents, and my sister, and 2 playdates. My best friend Sam has a 4 year old son too, so Camden came over to play in the snow last week. Then another friend from high school has a 4 year old son and a 1 year old son, and they came over yesterday for a playdate. We also have another family friend with a 4 year old son, and the family across the street has a 4 year old boy too. It's such a blessing, he has some built-in friends with parents that I already like!
We haven't started any kind of formal schooling for him, his education right now is learning English and getting accustomed to living here. We do go to the library once a week though for story and craft time. It's a class for 2 year olds, but with Vivi being 2, Journey being almost 2, and Jebriel not speaking English and being a little bit behind, we were able to get special permission to bring all 3. I promised we'd leave if they got crazy, but we've had 2 sessions and they have been great! There are 3 stories with songs in between, one song they get to use either a shaker or rhythm sticks, and the librarian is great, she's great with the kids and does all the different voices in the books. After the stories, we move over to some tables for a craft. Every week has an animal theme, so far we have done dogs and cats.
We signed Jebriel up for soccer, it doesn't start until April but you register now, I guess because they have to order t-shirts and everything. It's just through city parks and rec, non-competitive and fun (and cheaper than the local sports club!) By April he should be pretty fluent in English and is already good at following directions, so I think he'll really enjoy it.
And speaking of English, he is really catching on. He knows the English words for a lot of foods, and while he still uses the Amharic words for a lot of foods, we know those words too, and the girls have picked up on them. Now when I take bread out of the oven, everyone is chanting "Dabo! Dabo! Dabo!" We still say the Amharic and then the English word for all the words we know ("where's your kwas ball?") or sometimes we'll say it in English first and then in Amharic to remind him. He kind of picks and chooses which ones to start saying in English and which ones to keep saying in Amharic. Most of the time he says 'chama', but every once in awhile he'll say 'shoes'. He also knows a few phrases like "don't touch!" "be nice!" and "go play!" and just this weekend started saying "what's that?" It's kind of weird to see him say "mom, what's that?" so clearly. He understands almost everything we say to him now too, so his understanding of English is ahead of his speech, which is normal. I just spoke with a friend who adopted a 5 year old from Ethiopia over the summer and she said after 2 months her daughter was speaking only English. Broken English, she hadn't completely grasped it, but no Amharic. That kind of makes me sad, how fast he will lose his native language. Of course English will benefit him better here, but I do hope to help him retain at least a few words.
Not a whole lot to update on Vivi and Journey, they are still enjoying having their brother home. Journey is struggling a little bit because Vivi used to be more slow paced and she could keep up, but now Vivi wants to be just like Jebby and poor Journey can't always keep up with him and the things he likes to do. For the most part they play well together, they all like the play kitchen and taking care of baby dolls. A lot of my day is spent tasting pretend food from my 3 little chefs and admiring dolls as they are being fed or rocked or pushed in the shopping cart.
We've been keeping pretty busy, but I'll end this post. I never set out to write such long posts, but once I start typing it's hard to stop sometimes!
The past week has started to feel more 'normal' and less like we are still getting used to each other. He has figured out our routine and knows what behaviors we will and won't tolerate. That doesn't mean he follows them all the time, he IS a 4 year old boy after all ;) but for the most part he's a very well behaved child. He is gentle with his sisters-if they argue over a toy he won't yank it away or push them, he just holds on tight and calls for one of us to come to the rescue.
He came to us terrified of animals, we had to keep our cats locked in the back room for the first 2 days. Then he slowly got used to them and stopped freaking out when he saw them, and now he's totally fine with them. Except at night-part of his bedtime routine is making sure there are no cats hiding in his room :)
Then the first time we went to my parents' house, he got upset when he saw their cats. Well, technically he saw Moses, the giant fluffy cat with no tail, so in his defense, he may not have realized it was a cat. But, we were just over for dinner tonight and he saw and petted both cats without stressing out about it. Our next plan of action is to find a very well behaved little dog, and move up from there. My sister has 2 big dogs that can be wild and loud, and Eric's brother has 2 big dogs that are total lovers, but in an in-your-face, lick-you-all-over kind of way that is cute unless they are as tall as you and you're afraid of animals. It hasn't taken him long to start overcoming his fear of cats, so hopefully he'll be a dog lover soon too. Not so much that he wants one as a pet though ;)
He was very wary of new foods, and at every meal would scan the table and make sure I was aware of all the things he would not eat by pointing and saying "mama, no" and waving his hand over his plate. The first few days he was home, we let it slide. Everything was new and different, so we let him eat whatever made him feel comfortable. But as he became more comfortable, we slowly started requiring that he at least have the food on his plate, whether he touched it or not, and eventually put our 'rule' into place for him too that before you get seconds of anything, you need to take a 'polite bite' of the other food on your plate. We never require eating a whole pile of anything they actually don't like, but encourage a polite bite and remind them that they might like it, and won't know unless they try. The first few meals with this rule, he left the table after eating the food that he did like on his plate. Then he would very reluctantly and dramatically take a tiny taste and be sure to act disgusted.
After awhile though, he could no longer hide his liking for some of the foods he tried. It started with carrots-every afternoon I cut up some fresh veggies, I try to do an assortment of colors, to put out before dinner. They get a snack after naptime, but if they are hungry between 4pm and dinner, they can eat the veggies. For days, he would scoff at the bowl and never go near it, and then stand in the kitchen and ask for dinner every 2 minutes. Then one day, I was cutting up some carrots and he asked to see. I showed him and offered him one, and he took it. And ate it. And asked for more. That day, I had to cut more carrots, which I never have to do. Then it was mango-he spent 10 minutes making sure I knew he would NOT touch the mango on his plate, and then when it came time to take a polite bite before having more pasta, he only acted a little bit disgusted, and as I was scooping more pasta, he ate another piece, and ended up eating half a mango. Now that he's realizing that he actually DOES like a lot of new foods, he is much more willing to try them. One thing I know for sure he doesn't like though is red bell pepper. He very confidently took a bite when both girls were eating them and made a genuine yucky face!
We've had a couple of family dinners, with my parents, Eric's parents, and my sister, and 2 playdates. My best friend Sam has a 4 year old son too, so Camden came over to play in the snow last week. Then another friend from high school has a 4 year old son and a 1 year old son, and they came over yesterday for a playdate. We also have another family friend with a 4 year old son, and the family across the street has a 4 year old boy too. It's such a blessing, he has some built-in friends with parents that I already like!
We haven't started any kind of formal schooling for him, his education right now is learning English and getting accustomed to living here. We do go to the library once a week though for story and craft time. It's a class for 2 year olds, but with Vivi being 2, Journey being almost 2, and Jebriel not speaking English and being a little bit behind, we were able to get special permission to bring all 3. I promised we'd leave if they got crazy, but we've had 2 sessions and they have been great! There are 3 stories with songs in between, one song they get to use either a shaker or rhythm sticks, and the librarian is great, she's great with the kids and does all the different voices in the books. After the stories, we move over to some tables for a craft. Every week has an animal theme, so far we have done dogs and cats.
We signed Jebriel up for soccer, it doesn't start until April but you register now, I guess because they have to order t-shirts and everything. It's just through city parks and rec, non-competitive and fun (and cheaper than the local sports club!) By April he should be pretty fluent in English and is already good at following directions, so I think he'll really enjoy it.
And speaking of English, he is really catching on. He knows the English words for a lot of foods, and while he still uses the Amharic words for a lot of foods, we know those words too, and the girls have picked up on them. Now when I take bread out of the oven, everyone is chanting "Dabo! Dabo! Dabo!" We still say the Amharic and then the English word for all the words we know ("where's your kwas ball?") or sometimes we'll say it in English first and then in Amharic to remind him. He kind of picks and chooses which ones to start saying in English and which ones to keep saying in Amharic. Most of the time he says 'chama', but every once in awhile he'll say 'shoes'. He also knows a few phrases like "don't touch!" "be nice!" and "go play!" and just this weekend started saying "what's that?" It's kind of weird to see him say "mom, what's that?" so clearly. He understands almost everything we say to him now too, so his understanding of English is ahead of his speech, which is normal. I just spoke with a friend who adopted a 5 year old from Ethiopia over the summer and she said after 2 months her daughter was speaking only English. Broken English, she hadn't completely grasped it, but no Amharic. That kind of makes me sad, how fast he will lose his native language. Of course English will benefit him better here, but I do hope to help him retain at least a few words.
Not a whole lot to update on Vivi and Journey, they are still enjoying having their brother home. Journey is struggling a little bit because Vivi used to be more slow paced and she could keep up, but now Vivi wants to be just like Jebby and poor Journey can't always keep up with him and the things he likes to do. For the most part they play well together, they all like the play kitchen and taking care of baby dolls. A lot of my day is spent tasting pretend food from my 3 little chefs and admiring dolls as they are being fed or rocked or pushed in the shopping cart.
We've been keeping pretty busy, but I'll end this post. I never set out to write such long posts, but once I start typing it's hard to stop sometimes!
Monday, January 16, 2012
Day 1 in pictures
This is the mostly picture post, if you're interested in the whole story, scroll down to the previous post :)
Making Jebby's sign
Right before we went to the airport! Vivi is showing off her favorite headband, and Journey is copying Vivi :)
Holding their sign and waving their flags. Vivi was SO serious watching for daddy and Jebby!
Greeting their brother
Hugs <3
Family of 5
Pulling his own suitcase-I love that you can see the flag in this picture!
Vivi trying to be just like big brother
teamwork!
Vivi and Jeb holding hands on the way home
Snoozing on the couch while Vivi eats all the popcorn
Making Jebby's sign
Right before we went to the airport! Vivi is showing off her favorite headband, and Journey is copying Vivi :)
Holding their sign and waving their flags. Vivi was SO serious watching for daddy and Jebby!
Greeting their brother
Hugs <3
Family of 5
Pulling his own suitcase-I love that you can see the flag in this picture!
Vivi trying to be just like big brother
teamwork!
Vivi and Jeb holding hands on the way home
Snoozing on the couch while Vivi eats all the popcorn
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